Bhutan

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(05/08 - Thursday)
Cam and I drag ourselves out of bed at the crack of dawn for a two hour hike up to the Tiger's Nest. This is the location where Guru Rimboche, (he is credited with bringing Buddhism to Bhutan), landed after flying on a tiger from Bumthang in Eastern/Central Bhutan. He then proceeded to meditate for six months in a cave in the side of the mountain, from which the monastery is precariously anchored.

Our timing is incredibly lucky as we are the first people up the mountain by a good hour. This allows us to have a magical experience as the weather was still moderately cool and the path was yet undisturbed by the several dozens of tourists we saw on our way down. Just prior to the monastery, we are fortunate to witness dozens of monks making elaborate sculptures out of butter and flour (see my photos) that are to be used in the upcoming festival. Stepping down rickety stone stairs, our guide tells us several horror stories of people who have fallen off the steps or watched their cameras plunge to certain doom on the rocks below. Nonetheless, the early morning air, lack of tourists, and nearby waterfall makes it feels as though we are stumbling onto the monastery as the first visitors in years. We are the only tourists in the temple for the entire duration of our visit.

After heading down and filling ourselves with lunch (this time including the famed jellied yak skin...), we head to the Drukyl Dzong which is the oldest dzong (but was burned down). It resembles a the medieval ruins of a fortress and is fortunate to have the Bhutanese Himalayas as a backdrop.

After a short break at our hotel to recharge, Cam and I venture out for an incredibly stressful hot stone bath on the other side of town. We think it will be a very tough time sarcastically, but find that the gauntlet system of smoky rocks added to our bath by an overzealous Bhutanese man tests our ability to withstand the smell of ourselves boiling.

The recipe for the hot stone bath is as follows:
(Ingredients)
1 medium size bonfire
a big pile of rocks, a.k.a large stones
1 small shack containing two adjacent hot tub size pools separated by a metal grate, a metal ramp, and a doggies style door attached to the ramp leading out back to the large bonfire
2 unsuspecting victims
(Directions)
Create small bonfire out back of wooden shack. Tosses large stones (about 8 inches in diameter) on top of fire. Heat stones until glowing and laughing with a fiery anger, a.k.a. crackle. Toss several stones quickly through door, down ramp, into the first pool so unsuspecting victims can't see how many stones have been dropped into the pool. Invite unsuspecting victims into the pool. Watch as they enter the tub. Then, when asking if they want more stones to heat up the pool, pretend you don't understand when they say "no, please." Laugh.

All in all, we lasted over 30 minutes and the bath was very relaxing after we got past the initial sensation of the smell of our own flesh simmering.
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(05/07 - Wednesday)
A seven hour roundtrip car ride allows us to visit Punakha and its famed dzong/monastery that is situated on the banks of two intersecting rivers. In addition, we visit the temple of the 'divine madman' who practiced divine acts through alcohol and women. Cam draws multiple humorous parallels to how this monk would fare well in nightlife in Moscow... Our experiences today are far different from our past few days in Thimpu. The countryside of Bhutan is gorgeous. Spruce, Cypress, Magnolia, and Rhodoendrons are just a few of the beautiful plants that grow on the mountainsides. On a curious note, there are also palm trees and cactus growing wild.

After our day trip, we arrive to our hotel just outside of Paro. As there are few guests during the middle of this week, I am able to wander into the kitchen (much to the surprise of the proprietor) and ask if I could watch how they make some of their famed Bhutanese dishes, such as hot chillies in cheese sauce and bread (unfilled) Tibetan style momos. (Yes, they're both delicious.) They were very kind and I have, in turn, learned some secrets of perfecting a spicy cheese sauce. Watch out, my future eaters!

Although the people are extremely friendly and the scenery continues to amaze us, we are left with that same feeling of "what to do" in the evenings as nightlife is definitely not up to "Moscow" standards. Fortunately, without worries for the altitude, Cam and I are allowed to kick back with some Druk Lager and a book.

Tomorrow we have an early morning hike up to the Tiger's Nest and other sightseeing (and eating) to help us fully enjoy our last day in Bhutan!
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(05/06 - Tuesday)
Today we visited several locations around town including a monastery, an arts school, a paper making factory, and the town Dzong. While these are very interesting to visit, the fact that no one bats an eyelash at our presence, especially not in the school among the dozen classrooms we visited, is a bit curious. Not even when Cam pulled out his oversized SLR from his backpack! Lending more credibility to our Disney World tourism model, we appear to be shuffled around to specific locations at particular intervals so we don't run into many other tourists, but are clearly visiting 'groomed-for-tourist' locations. Don't let my tone of writing here totally taint my description of Bhutan, as the
people are all very friendly and the towns and scenery are all beautiful. The upshot of these visits for both Cam and I, aside from increased cultural exposure and future years of inside jokes, are fantastic photographs.

Amusingly, our guide (in his always cheery tone of voice) is very kind in answering every single one of our questions. I will try to keep a list these amusing facts that result in both Cam and I flashing each other the "wtf" look during conversations with our guide.

In addition, Cam and I have begun complimenting our meals and various aspects of Bhutan into salt shakers over meals as we find many aspects of our travels that feel as though Disneyland is operating from North Korea.

List of Curious Facts About Bhutan (source: our guide)
* Marijuana grows wild throughout the city and is commonly used as decoration in paper making. However, anyone caught smoking or using the plant improperly will find themselves immediately locked up for three months, minimum.
* There is, apparently, only one Bhutanese restaurant in Thimpu. All other restaurants cater to foreign cuisine.
* There is no candy produced in Bhutan. All candy is imported from either Thailand or India.
*For the next month, all meat shops are closed for religious reasons. Thus, all citizens are drying strips of meat (mostly beef) outside their windows and balconies to tide them over until the shops open again. The strips, at first glance from our car ride, appear to be dull colored party streamers.
*The Dalai Lama isn't allowed in Bhutan as an act of compliance with the Chinese government. However, many Bhutanese travel to India to see him.
*India is the major source of funding for Bhutan. In fact, next week, the Indian PM is coming to Thimpu to help them set up their five-year budget and re-negotiate elements of the India-Bhutan relationship.
*There are no architects or structural engineers used to make buildings in Bhutan. Apparently, each building project has a head artist and a head mason. No drawings or visual plans are used in the construction process.
*In the 7th century, the Bhutanese are rumored to have practiced cannibalism following defeat of an enemy. To replace this act, they now chew on a mashed up mixture of wine, betel nut, and paan (betel leaf).
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(05/05 - Monday)
An early morning flight complete with airport chaos due to the previous day's cancelled flight lands us in Paro, the airport with the (reportedly) worst landing strip in the world due to it's mountainous terrain.

Cam and I are promptly whisked away by our tour guide to see the Paro Dzhong and an archery tournament involving a "naughty" prince who was "naughty" because he committed murder and served 10 years in prison. By the tone in our guide's voice, we were expecting him to have dated too many ladies or something along those lines. We amused by the hearty giant sized laugh coming out of our pint sized guide and hope his sense of humor is not just for show.

The lack of pollution (especially in comparison to Kathmandu) is a welcome relief for our lungs, but we can't help escape the feeling that Bhutan feels a little like Disney World (you know, the lagoon in EPCOT center with all the 'nations'?) There are several reasons for this:

***Costumes:
At the entrance of several public areas, signs are posted indicating a required traditional dress for all Bhutanese citizens who wish to enter.
***Slogans and Branding:
We have seen several shirts/hats/stores with the phrase "In Pursuit of Gross National Happiness" scrawled across their respective fronts.
***Hygiene:
Bhutan is a clean country as we are lead around. However, when Campbell and I wander the streets ourselves, we find areas that are not so clean (but still clean compared to Kathmandu).
***Restricted Areas:
Apparently, it is forbidden for tourists to visit several geographic areas of the country.
***Limited Visit Duration:
Visitors can only visit Bhutan for approximately two weeks. However, this can be extended with the right amount of cash - akin to adding on a few days to the park entrance ticket life. Hand stamps, unfortunately, are not required.
***Daily Park Fees:
Bhutan requires tourists to travel through travel agencies and pay a minimum of $200 a day for all inclusive accomodations.
***Rides:
Cam and I are holding out to see if they have any water rides available in the country (whitewater rafting excluded.)


After an hour drive to Thimpu, we realize our exhaustion and plop down for naps before heading out into town to wander before dinner.